Focus T25

 

 

Oh my gosh... I have started a new journey and let me tell ya OUCH.. I bought into the hype and I ordered T25. I have never been one to be able to work out on my own at home. I was more into the fitness classes where there are other people in the room and I kept up in fear of looking like an idiot. Well gym memberships are so expensive so I had to get rid of the membership. I tried the whole running thing and that was hard ( I am a wimp). I tried the whole diet thing and well that worked but that was not enough. I have became something I don't want to be weight wise and its time to change that. I know I had three kids and my body took a beating, so what, I know that Liam is only 4 months old but so what, it is not okay. The weight needs to go away....
I have taught myself over the last few weeks how to eat and how to eat healthy. It was hard and well I slip here and there ( maybe a little more then here and there) but it is all a learning process. The weight just isn't coming off as fast as I would like it to.. So here we go. With the support of my hubby the next 60 days of my life will be doing 25 minutes of intense exercises side by side with him. We completed day three last night and well it hurts. Everything hurts, my butt, my legs, my shoulders and my back. That's good though or so I have been told.
I don't want to flood my Facebook with all of my weight loss goals, achievements or struggles so I will do it on here.. NO I promise I will not become some health nut who tries to force it on others. Not at all, everyone is their own person and are free to do what they want. I have just spent so much of the last two years trying to be like others that I lost myself and this is me getting me back.  This blog is about my journey. My Journey as a stay at home mom (not by choice), a wife and how I get back to me.

DAY 1... Gross

Life is hard

Yes it is, Life sure is hard,
The last year has been a tornado for this family. We have been through hell and back but ya know what? We are still standing. It has been tough and there have been great days and awful good for nothing days. We have learned who our true friends are and that family isn't always blood. Most of all we have learned the importance of family and that no matter the distance my family ROCKS...
I truly believe that my family needed these hard lessons and though we are not totally out of the funk we will be soon. Life is hard yes, but it is all about what you make of the hard times that determine how you come out of the crap. I chose to come out of the crap still standing and happy.
I have spent a lot of time thinking and have realized I have became someone I am not really a fan of. I have became unhappy and resentful and I really do not like it. So whats a girl to do? Change this. I refuse to sit around and Facebook status how rough I have it or how its all poor me and stuff. Time for some major life changes,  SO... Out with the negative and in with the positive. Thank you life for the lessons and watch out world here come the NUNENKAMPS....

Pregnancy is so beautiful

Ha, hell no.....

My guess would be that whoever came up with the statement " pregnancy is beautiful " was a man or a delusional woman.  I am having a hard time coming up with a long list of " beautiful" and an easy time coming up with " gross and yuck " well those are my non vulgar words. LOL

So lets see here, this is my list of "beautiful"...

1. The final product of a beautifully bathed baby boy or girl
2. The ability to not feel bad for cashing out a whole bag of potato chips just because you wanted to
3. The wonderful kicks and movements you get to feel...
4. .....
5. .....


Okay that is all I got...

Now lets look at the not so beautiful

Morning Sickness
What an awful name for it because really how many times does it only happen in the am? That would be great if it did because you could make plans around it instead of random " crap I need to run to the rest room and puke"..

Insomnia
Whats this all about? Someone told me that this is so your body gets used to it when baby comes. I mean really, does tossing and turning in your bed all night really prepare you for up every 2 hours to a screaming baby begging for food? Um, nope not even close, totally different. Let us sleep now because it will be at least a year before we know what sleep is again..

BOOBS...
Yeah for those of us who generally do not have any boobs the first few months of pregnancy are great. They grow and you can actually wear a bra and look like you hit puberty, but after like month 6 gross. They are ginormous, covered in veins and lets face it ladies, leaking weird stuff. Yeah that makes one feel a little less then fabulous.  Pregnant boobs are so not attractive, I don't care who says they are..

Weight gain
Bless my hubbies heart for saying ALL the time " honey you are not fat you are pregnant". Okay so this explains why my belly is sticking out so far I can not see my feet but what about the rest? I am pretty sure there is no need for my arms to expand or for my thighs to become unrecognisable but hey maybe there is some reason out there and I have just not found it. 

Heart burn
Holy burning. Need I say more?

GAS....
Yeah I know I know, woman don't have gas. Ha, so not true and even more false when preggers. Nothing like being in a quiet crowded area and OOOPS ... How horrifying right? That's right ladies it happens to us all and you know how you think " maybe no one will know it is me after all there are a ton of people in here" hell no, everyone will blame the preggers one because everyone knows we can not hold it in. Just suck it up and laugh because that is about all you can do.


Advice or should I say to much advice
Everyone has an opinion yes I know but I am not sure it always needs to be stated out loud. Yes I know this bag of chips I am cashing out isn't healthy duh who doesn't. Oh you wouldn't do it this way? Well I will. You wouldn't eat that or drink that? Well I will. Your Dr is doing that, wow that's not safe. I trust in my Dr. You should find a new Dr. Yeah probably not but thanx. Oh my gosh, when that happened to me this went horribly wrong. Stop. I mean stop please.
I appreciate all the advice I can get yes of course but the horror stories or the ones that have a negative outcome can be kept to yourself. I don't need fear I need positive... I understand everyone does things different and the way I do pregnant you may not but its the way I do it and it works for me just like your way worked for you..

The glowing skin
Yup today it glows but tomorrow it may look like  14 year old boy who just hit puberty.

The kicks
This goes is both beautiful and not. The first few months of being able to feel these little kicks and movements are AMAZING but in the final months OMG they hurt. Sometimes I swear he is trying to come out of my bellybutton. I always tell Andy, " when this kid is older I am going to randomly elbow him and just say " paybacks suck"...

I feel like I had more idea while I took that 3 minute shower I was able to take today.  Oh well add to it ladies if you want because I am sure there are way more...
The moral of this long story is this. Yes the end product is an AMAZING cute and cuddly baby that you love and adore. The 9 months it takes to get there well not so amazing. Agree??
XO ~ T

To my girls

It seems like just yesterday I was breaking it to my mom that I was having a baby. It has been a roller coaster for sure these last 8 years but I can say this for sure, it has been worth every second of it. I am not sure I would change a thing.  I have always wanted to write something to my girls and get out what has ALWAYS been in my head, so here I go. 

To my Girls,
You two are the most amazing accomplishment I have ever achieved in my life. I have never loved anything more then I love you. Graci, you are so smart and beautiful and mom is so proud of all of the hard work you do. The fact that you want to change the world makes my heart melt. You have a heart of gold and I truly hope that you use that to do huge things in your life. Ayva, you are my spunky one. I have a hard time keeping up with you and love that you have such amazing energy. You are truly an amazing little girl and I love how you always want to learn something new. I love how you show affection and have so much love to give.
You two light up my life and have made me who I am today. I wish nothing but amazing things for you and I promise to be here every step of the way. I will hold your hand, wipe your tears, ground you, embarrass you and cry with you because I am your mom and that's what we do.  There are some things you need to know that may help you walk through life. 

1.  Life is hard but it should be fun, Laugh out loud (allot) and have fun.
2. Make the best out of every situation. Please try and see the upside to everything. Bad things are gonna happen and you can sit out and take it or you can jump back up and move on.
3. You will get your heart broken and probably more then once but remember this one thing. Years down the road you will find that boy on whatever social network is popular at the time and see that you dodged a major bullet. 
4. Never give up... If you have a goal go for it. I will always be proud of you for going for what you want and I will always back you up.
5. Its not about how many friends you have its about who those friends are. Friends should always have your back no matter what. 
6. Forgiveness... Forgiveness.... Forgiveness.... Its hard to hold on to anger. Someone may hurt you and you may think it is unforgivable at the time but if it is a true friend it is probably worth working it out. 
7. Say you are sorry when you are sorry. If you hurt someone, say you are sorry. Its hard and sometimes feels impossible but do it. It could make a huge difference in your life.
8. HAVE FUN.... Always have fun. Okay yeah I am repeating myself but I think fun is so important.
9. Know that mom loves you. I know I yell allot and I promise from this day forward to work on that.
10. I know you are going to go out and drink behind my back at some point. Don't go out and try and prove a point your first time ever drinking. All that will get you is a head in the toilet a massive headache and probably a super long grounding. :)
11. Don't do drugs. There is no point. I know you may try and if you are like me you wont like em much.
12. I do not expect straight As and I never will. I only expect that you do your best at everything you do.
13. Be kind to people. Even the ones that are cruel to you. Treat everyone the way you want to be treated. People can be cruel and no matter what don't let them bring you down.

I am sure I am missing so many tips and tricks but we have many many years for me to give you advice. I just want you girls to know that no matter what you do I will always love you. You aren't going to always make the greatest choices out there and we will bump heads allot but when push comes to shove I will always have your back because that's what mommas do.  Always be yourself and do not ever let anyone tell you that you are not good enough because you are. You can be anything you want to do in this world and you can be whatever you want. Hard work will pay off, but always remember who you are and where you came from.  I love you more then life itself.
XOXO MOM

Looking at my life

 

 

With all of the crazy holiday cheer we reflect on life and what we did wrong and what we can change and we make a long list for the start of next year of everything we are going to change...We are going to work out more, we are going to make more money, we are going to eat healthier and blah blah blah. Who actually follows the list for longer then a month? Not I and I am so not making a list this year either..

This year was our first year with just the 4 of us and no guests coming over. I was sad we wouldn't be with our usual company but worried that my family would be bored and this would be considered the worst Christmas ever. I thought that maybe I should plan some fun things, well with me not feeling well all week and stressing over shopping I failed at that one, so we just hung out. We held down the couches, took much needed naps, played a few games and watched dumb movies. To me, it was perfect. 

It never fails someone gets sick and this year it was Ayva. She fell hard too, spending most of the day on the couch.  Me being the amazing momma that I am decided to sit right next to her all day. :) While I sat there I looked around the room and saw Graci glued to her new IPOD and Andy sound asleep scrunched on the smallest couch ever. PERFECT. It was so quiet in my house and all I could do was think about how amazing my life is.

I complain and whine allot, I have daily temper tantrums and many times wish I had more then I have. I find myself sometimes wondering what our life would be like if we would have waited to have kids and you know, paid off college first and worked a few years in our fields we worked so hard to get into, then moments like yesterday hit me and I realize, I wouldn't trade my life for anything in the world.

We did life ass backwards yes I know. We struggle monthly to pay bills, I shop for grocery's at Walmart (yup and I am proud of it), my girls don't have all designer clothes on neither do mom and dad. But, the bills get paid, we never go without, we eat dinner every night as a family and we do things together..  We may not be able to have the weekly date night that I hear about from other moms but we watch pointless TV together every night, and that's my favorite time of the day. My favorite saying EVER is " We may not have it all but together we have it all". what a great saying..

All in all here is my lesson learned.

Yup, I just babbled on about what to you might seem pointless and that is fine. I guess my whole point here is this, life is hard for everyone. We all struggle in some way but none of us are better then the other. Some of us may go out allot and even have kids, so what. Some people don't work out as much as the other, again so what. We are all people and we are all here just trying to make it in life. I know in the beginning of this I said I was not going to make a New Years list but as I finish this I have changed my mind. Here is my list.

1. To be a better person

2. To eat a little better and work out a little more

3. To go out and party more with my friends, well after baby of course

4. To live life to the fullest

 

Yup there is a list and I am going to try and follow it but you know what, if I slack a bit oh well. I am a happy girl and have everything I need. Life is good and I hope in the new year life is good for you all too.  XOXO